And to really enjoy the act of slowing down, rather than seeing it as another “project” to measure!
Today marks two weeks until the New York Marathon! This weekend, I also completed my longest training run – 18 miles – and now it’s time to taper ahead of race day. But as I write this, I’m also thinking beyond the marathon itself…
I read something this week that really resonated. It was about the dangers of constantly needing to self-optimise, and recognising the point at which personal development and growth can become a bit toxic.
The glorification of goals, discipline and having a plan can make us feel like we’re achieving, progressing and, therefore, “successful”. And the opposite might also be true – when we’re not achieving or progressing, we might feel we’re somehow falling behind. But, as with most things, it’s a healthy balance we need to find, and that’s something only we ourselves can really know.
For me, having physical goals can sometimes come at a cost. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that rest and recovery equal unproductive time. We might even feel guilty about slowing down if we feel the need to be constantly achieving more, doing more or improving ourselves further.
We might become so accustomed to being busy that we forget how to simply stop, without feeling that we should be doing something else.
I’ve been thinking about this through the lens of my marathon training, looking back at what I’ve learned over the years of running and how perhaps I’ve changed (or not!).
There’s a strange point in marathon preparation when you hit the taper, which is where I am now. As race day approaches, you have to ease back and let your body recover. It can feel counter-intuitive, particularly if the last couple of weeks haven’t gone according to plan, as mine haven’t.
I’ve been ill, so I’ve been forced to stop, slow down and rest. I’ve missed some key long runs and had to adapt my plan, which I wrote about last time. Of course, I’d rather have been well and completed those runs, but there’s nothing I can do about that now.
And with two weeks to go, there’s very little more I can do to prepare for race day. My job now is to recover, arrive at the start line as rested as possible and trust the training I’ve done.
In running and other forms of physical exercise, we understand intellectually that training alone isn’t enough. We need to give our bodies time to adapt to the stress we’ve placed on them. The hard work matters, but so does what happens between training sessions. Without recovery, we’re unlikely to get the full benefit of the work we’ve put in.
Yet, it’s much harder to put this into practice. And how often do we apply the same thinking to the rest of our lives?
If we’re constantly looking to achieve, improve and be productive in all areas of our lives, we can feel guilty about slowing down. Even when we do stop, we might find ourselves thinking about everything we could be doing instead.
And if you’re anything like I’ve been, you might even turn recovery into another thing to optimise and measure. We track our sleep, monitor our resting heart rate and heart rate variability, and look for ways to make our downtime more beneficial.
There’s something slightly ironic about the idea of becoming more productive at resting! It’s as if, if something can’t be measured, it can’t be worthwhile.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to improve ourselves. Goals give us direction, discipline helps us follow through, and having a goal without a plan means we risk drifting. I’m certainly not suggesting we abandon any of that.
But perhaps we need to question when the drive for improvement stops serving us and starts becoming another source of pressure. When does wanting to be healthier, stronger or better begin to make us feel that who we are, or what we’re doing, isn’t quite enough? That’s the thing to watch out for.
Sometimes, we need space to process, reflect, recharge and simply be, rather than constantly striving to become a better version of ourselves. Not every moment needs to be productive. Not every task needs to be about hitting a target. Not every day needs to be filled with something that can be measured or tracked.
Rest doesn’t always need to have a purpose beyond allowing us simply to rest.
Quite frankly, I can’t wait to taper. To slow down, take the pressure off and let my body recover.
And as I approach 50, I’m beginning to feel the same way about life. I want to build more tapering into it. To stop feeling that I always need to be doing something, achieving something or working towards something.
Maybe the next challenge for me isn’t about doing more or becoming better at something. Maybe it’s about learning to slow down and just be.
Easier said than done!
p.s. I’m running New York to fundraise for Dementia UK – if you are able to spare a few pennies, I’d be so grateful.
